Opus 2018-302: Trash Talk

Why do I let the trash pile up so high before I empty it?

I could come up with a lot of reasons like, “Why empty it when it isn’t full and it isn’t full until things start falling out.”  I could claim to care about the environment and want to use as few plastic trash bags as possible but I am already recycling grocery bags.  An idea has been brewing below the surface of my conscious thought and today it emerged full grown.

I let the trash pile up because it gives my wife so much joy to tell me to empty it.  I think it fills a need in her life to be in charge and feel needed.  It is important for her to feel that I am a helpless male  and can’t do simple things.  You have probably seen the comedy sketch that appears in so many forms of the man left to do the laundry, puts in the whole box of detergent and ends up floating out of the house on the suds.  I have not found that funny since I learned to read and saw that there were instructions on the box, but if it tickles our fancy, enjoy.

The same thing applies to haircuts.  If left to myself I would be glad to never go to a barber shop again.  I might shave my head every few years or give myself a buzz cut every few months, but I really don’t care how long my hair gets.  That changed when I got married but I find it easier to just wait until she says I need one.  When my dad used to ask me when I was going to get a hair cut I would sometimes say, “About a month after you stop asking.”  I don’t think that would work with my wife.

So I guess it is time to empty the trash.

homo unius libri